How do I get to Tesco's?

One way streets and pedestrianised walkways can make the giving, and, more importantly, the remembering of directions, a trifle difficult in town centres. That the above request. I was waiting time on Cary Parade in the centre of Torquay to day when a man boarded the bus and said he would like directions to Tesco's Metro store. I asked if he planed to drive there or walk. This baffled him for a moment, "What difference would it make," he wanted to know.

"Well sir, if you are driving then you need to follow this road round to the right and at the Clock Tower roundabout you need to go all the way round and come back the way you came. Drive along the road you can see the other side of this central reservation to the next roundabout where you should turn right, the second exit. Follow that road until you reach the traffic lights, not the pedestrian lights but the traffic lights. Turn right there, taking the road that is at a right angle to the one you are on not the road that doubles back on it's self. Go up there to the next lights and turn right again. At the next lights go straight on. After that the road goes down a hill. At the bottom of the hill follow the road round to the left, you can only go to the left but it is now a one way street but you need to be in the right hand lane so you can take the first road on the right. That is an other one way street but stay in the right lane as you need to turn right at the bottom. Now you need to get in the left lane as you are going to take the 3rd turning on the left. Still with me sir? You should now be in a road with lots of shops on both sides. If you aren't then you have gone wrong some where and you should stop and ask someone. Anyway, next lights turn left but take the road to the right as soon as you have turned. Nearly there. Follow through until you come to what looks like a roundabout but it isn't actually a roundabout. As you go round you will see Tesco's on your left but there is no where to park. There is only one road you can take from here, Abbey Rd. Drive up there. There are some one hour parking bays on the right. You should find somewhere to park there but don't be to long or a Parking Attendant will stick a £60.00 F.P.N. on you car they are very keen round here. Should take about 15 mins. Got all that?"

A slow nod, a second or two to think. "What if I walk?"

"Oh that's dead easy, first left, Tesco's is at the top on the right. Can't miss it. Take about 2 mins."